#0043 Consider yourself a best friend: From wannabe to authentic creative
Be Your Own BFF to Shift Your Mindset
Have you ever doubted you’re a Creative Person? Let your Inner Critic talk you into believing you are an imposter?
Of course! It happens to all of us.
When I introduced ways to shift from self-doubt (#0040), I included the notion of friendship. Specifically, befriending ourselves. We need to learn how to comfort and support ourselves as we would a friend in need.
Choose a Better Cloud
For this exercise, have two (2) sheets of paper and various colored pencils and pens, or a single magic writing stick will do.
Title the first sheet Wannabe Creative Person. Now jot down the words and phrases the Imposter Syndrome in your mind uses to bully you. Is it loud? Write the word BIG and bold. Do you feel torn open? Grab a bloody red marker to record the meanness. Does the same phrase buzz around incessantly? Write the phrase again and again, maybe in the shape of a spiral (like a snail’s shell). You get the idea.
The end result will be a word cloud. Alternatively, you may make a bulleted list.
Title the second sheet Support Your Creative BFF. This time, I want you to envision your best friend forever, the one who’s been there with you through all the ups and downs. You would not hesitate to comfort and support this person, and you know exactly what to say and do. Imagine your BFF comes to you distraught, questioning their authenticity as a Creative Person.
Now create a word cloud (or, alternatively, a bulleted list) with all the things you’d say, all the actions you’d take, to lift up your BFF. Pile on as many ways you’d want to share love with your BFF in this moment of crisis. Maybe your word cloud will look something like this:
Place the two sheets — Wannabe Creative Person and Support Your Creative BFF — side by side. Compare them.
Is every word and phrase in the Wannabe Creative Person word cloud true? Really true? If a word or phrase is not, cross it out.
Are there words and phrases in the Support Your Creative BFF word cloud that might help you? Circle them.
Consider what it would be like if you treated yourself as you do your BFF. Feel free to choose the better word cloud (you know which one).
When I befriend myself, it feels like lazing about on a fluffy cloud (because, well, word cloud? Plus, it’s too hot here right now to contemplate wrapping myself in blankets).
(Adapted from Greater Good in Education’s How Would You Treat a Friend? Practice.)
Oh! How we poison ourselves with such vileness. Get out, damn Imposter Syndrome! Leave us be, Inner Critic! Woah… Sometimes we creatives get a bit (melo)dramatic.
Beat back the melodrama by embracing yourself. Literally. Really!
Go ahead and give yourself a hug. Feels good, huh?
Next time: Compose a self-compassionate letter
What a beautiful exercise idea! 💡 Thanks for sharing! 💗