#0028 Create Strategies
How to implement 3 recommendations
Way back in January, I glossed Dr. Beth Kurland’s “How to Prepare Your Nervous System for New Goals,” highlighting how her seven recommendations applied to our intentions. The caboose of that list train has finally pulled into the 100 Rejections Club station. According to Dr. Kurland:
We can make a specific plan for working with obstacles that will likely arise. You can do this by anticipating what you know will come up, and using the obstacles that do come up as a springboard for creating strategies for yourself.
Let’s brainstorm how to create 3 strategies to take the string, er, sting out of rejection.
Rejection can kick our bodies into Fight, Flight, Freeze. But we can flip the coin to Rest when we reframe for a yes by embracing rejection, which is a much better state (of mind and body). Remember we embrace rejection:
Because rejection is your best friend.
Because rejection is not a referendum on your work.
Because rejection simply means redirection.
Because rejection shows you’re trying.
To take the sting out of rejection,
Post what it means to embrace rejection within eyeline of our computer screens.
Ambition can set us up to stop or stall or never start a project. Instead of cowering in the shadow of a vague and/or daunting idea, awaiting the Muse to save us, we can consider parts of the whole.
Once we’ve daydreamed a ginormous concept of creative self-expression, let’s be specific by breaking it down into small and manageable steps. Maybe it’s about our process (drawing 4 comic panels a week). Perhaps we need guidance (finding out the conventions of our chosen genre). Or we lean into practices (outlining the story). To take the sting out of rejection,
Dedicate a notebook to describe, step by step, all the bits and pieces — in granular detail — to get from the beginning to the end of our project.
Determination can create tunnel vision. When you only want to appear in that one magazine (New Yorker), if you only want to attend that one writers’ conference (Bread Loaf), when only the #1 literary agent (Robert Gottlieb, according to sales in 2023–24) should represent you? Yeah, umm, start embracing rejection.
Better yet? Time to develop alternatives whenever possible. As you prepare something for submission to A lit mag, consider another place (B lit mag), maybe many other places (C–J lit mags), that also be suitable. I’m talking here about simultaneous submissions. To take the sting out of rejection,
Seek out, bookmark, and read lists of open calls for submissions every week(ish).
To recap (because that’s what I’m ~mostly~ doing this time):
Reframe for a yes
Be specific
Develop alternatives
Though you can implement these 3 strategies by yourself, I’d be remiss not to add a bonus brainstorm.
Gathering in community with creatively minded folk — virtually or in person — makes taking the sting out of rejection much more fun.
Next time: 3 more strategies
"When you only want to appear in that one magazine (New Yorker)" Don't we give that up at around twenty? : )